… or so say Ellora’s Cave. At least I think that’s what they say. I applied for a copy editing position for Ellora’s Cave – a site that publishes romance fiction and various forms of erotic fiction. As part of my application I was asked to fill in an extensive questionnaire and to submit a resume, and at that point I’d be sent a copy editing test to undertake.

Among the questions was my definitions of  romance, sensual romance, erotica and pornography (or something like that), and the types of books, online mags etc. I read. Clearly they were not what Ellora’s Cave were looking for.

Imagine my surprise when I received the following email:

Dear Ms. Hartog,

Thank you for your interest in the editing positions at Ellora’s Cave, and for taking the time to complete the application and send your resume. Unfortunately, based on those, we don’t currently feel we’re an appropriate match for your strengths. Perhaps our professional paths will cross again in the future.

I wish you the best of luck in finding compatible and fulfilling employment!

Call me crazy, but I think a good editor is a good editor, no matter the material. I had a job editing right wing Republican rants, something far more out of my comfort zone than erotic literature, and my ability to parse those sentences was not impeded by my non right-wing leanings.  And, I even let Ellora’s Cave know I had been a top rated runner up in a Mills & Boon (the non-American version of Harlequin Romance) short story competition.  And I reviewed my great creative writing teacher – Rachel Resnick’s latest book, Love Junkie. And that’s full of erotic unmentionables. Sheesh!  I can’t believe  they didn’t even let  me take the test!

And so, it appears, my paws just aren’t smutty enough to edit erotic fiction. I will now have to take my heaving bosom and my dirty gerunds and seek solace in the arms of a vibrant, chiseled editor at another company.